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The Keys to a Good Education

RECENTLY The New York Times featured a front-page story about Latoya, a 16-year-old high school student. She was 11, she said, when her father began to beat and sexually abuse her. Her mother, who used drugs, had left the family. “Home,” the newspaper reported, “was an abandoned apartment with no toilet, or a room where she was too afraid to sleep.” However, Latoya was exceptional. Despite all of this, earlier this year Latoya was president of the National Honor Society at her high school and maintained a B average in honors classes.

What can assist a child even from a bad environment to do well in school? Often, a key to a good education is having a caring adult—preferably one or both of the child’s own parents—who is supportive and deeply involved in the child’s education. One high school senior felt this was so important that she was moved to say: “It is only with parental support that children can survive in school.”

Most teachers agree. A New York City teacher claimed: “For every student who does well and gets through the educational system—and there are many—there is a parent who was there every step of the way.”

Parental Support, an Important Key

Reader’s Digest last year explored the question, “Why do some students do better than others?” One of the conclusions was that “strong families give kids an edge in school.” Parents of such families provide their children with loving attention and impart to them proper values and goals. But one parent noted: “You can’t give the proper guidance if you don’t know what’s going on at school.”

A good way to find out is to visit. A mother who makes visits wrote: “When I walk the halls of my daughter’s school, I hear foul, obscene language. Kids are making out everywhere—if it were a movie, it would be rated X.” Such visits may help you to appreciate how difficult it is for children today to get a good education, as well as to live a moral life.

Significantly, the publication The American Teacher 1994 noted: “Students who have been victims of violence are more likely to say their parents have infrequent communications with school, such as individual meetings with teachers, parents’ or group meetings, or visits to the school.”

A concerned mother revealed what parents need to do. “Be there!” she said. “Let the school administration know that you’re interested in what your child is learning. I visit school often and sit in on classes.” Another mother emphasized the value of being a child’s advocate. She explained: “My children have gone to the office to speak to a counselor and have literally been ignored. When my child brought me in the next day, they bent over backward to help me—and my child.”

This mother of four boys also stressed the importance of taking an interest in school activities that directly affect your child’s education. “Attend open house, the science fair—anything your children may be doing that parents are invited to,” she said. “This gives you opportunities to meet your child’s teachers. They need to know that you view your child’s education as a very important part of his life. When teachers know this, they are more inclined to put time and extra effort into your child.”

Cooperation With Teachers

Some parents may feel that they have more important things to do on evenings when schools schedule special occasions for parents to interact with teachers. Yet, really, what is more important than making yourself available to those who are trying to help your children get a good education? Good parent-teacher cooperation is vital!

In Russia there is a fine provision to enhance parent-teacher cooperation. All school assignments are recorded in what is called a Dnievnik—a daily activity record that is combined with a calendar. A student must bring his Dnievnik to each class and make it available to the teacher on request. Students must also show the Dnievnik to their parents, who are requested to sign it each week. As Victor Lobachov, a Moscow father of school-age children, noted, “this information helps parents to keep acquainted with the assignments and grades of their children.”

Teachers today, however, often complain that parents fail to take an interest in the education of their children. One high-school teacher in the United States said that he once sent out 63 letters to parents informing them of their children’s poor academic performance. Only three parents responded by contacting him!

Truly, that is sad! Parents should be deeply involved in their child’s education, which is primarily their responsibility. An educator stated the matter correctly when he said: “The primary objective of formal education is to support parents in producing responsible young adults.”

Thus, parents should take the initiative in getting to know their child’s teachers. As one parent said, “the teachers need to feel free to call you at anytime.” And parents should welcome—even encourage—teachers to speak openly about their child. Parents should ask such specific questions as: Are you having any problems with my child? Is he respectful? Does he attend all classes? Does he arrive on time?

What if the teacher says something about your child that is not favorable? Do not assume that it is untrue. Unfortunately, many youths who appear to live honorable lives at home or at their place of worship are actually living a double life. So listen respectfully to the teacher, and check out what he or she says.

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